Though you never intended it to, the worst (in your eyes) has happened. All the time you spent planning, preparing, and praying seems to have had no effect on the outcome. Maybe everyone was rooting for you. You were surely rooting for yourself. Perhaps there was a lot riding on your success, but unfortunately—devastatingly—you failed.
Failure is one of the most uncomfortable realities that we all will face at some point in this life. No one wins at everything. No one can always get it right. But even though we know that failure is a part of life, we still have trouble processing it when it happens to us.
As Christians, how do we handle failure? Where do we aim our emotions and our thoughts when we face the empty result of our trying?
Thankfully, failure does not change the way that God sees us, and His Word helps us to navigate failure with honesty, with help, and with hope.
Three Ways to Handle Failure
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With Honesty
Sometimes, failure is a direct result of the decisions we made or failed to make. Often, the hardest part of not succeeding is the fact that we could have done something to prevent it. It’s important to be honest with ourselves when we assess the reason for our failure. Sometimes failure is a result of sin—like when we are unkind or unfaithful in a relationship and the relationship ends. Other times, failure is not a result of sin at all, but of an oversight on your part. This is true in situations such as forgetting to turn in necessary paperwork or neglecting to check the calendar. However your own actions contributed to your failure, it’s important to be honest. Practicing honesty with yourself will allow you to assess the situation accurately to avoid the same outcome again (Proverbs 11:3). It will also help when you reach out to God and others in the midst of your disappointment.
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With Help
Another way to respond to failure is to reach out for help. Having a trusted friend, mentor, or pastor to confide in can provide a great comfort when processing failure. As Christians, we have the responsibility, opportunity, and privilege to bear one another’s burdens and to encourage one another (Galatians 6:2). The right people in your life can remind you to turn to the Lord when you are struggling with failure. After all, it is God who is our ultimate source of help and healing when we are disappointed about certain outcomes in our lives. He is the One who promises to love us anyway, to be near to us, and to sustain us through failure. He is the One we can call on in sadness and in confusion and amid every other emotion that comes along with the sting of defeat. No matter what happens to us or because of us, we always belong to the Lord. And because we do, we have a divine and sure hope.
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With Hope
Finally, you can handle failure with hope. Just because you are bearing the weight of failure today, doesn’t mean you have to bear it forever. In front of you is the chance to succeed again and with you is the God who endures through both failure and success.
Through the honest processing of the mistakes we may have made, with the support of godly friends and family, and with the help of the Lord, you can overcome the uncomfortable weight of failure. While God does not promise that we will never face failure again, we know that He gives good gifts and He gives great grace (James 1:17, Psalm 84:11). Inevitably, you will likely face failure again in your lifetime. But even so, you can face failure with the hope and reassurance that only God can give.
